As a mother of three, it takes A LOT to freak me out and this weekend just proved that! Last night I was upstairs folding my 20th load of laundry when I heard screaming and shouting from downstairs. Thinking that one of the kids had hurt themselves, I raced down stairs to my family looking horrified while my three year old vomited all over the couch. I was relieved..but why in the heck were they mortified? Vomiting is normal, right?
Well apparently not, after I barked orders to everyone I thought things got back to normal. I was wrong. You see at least three other times when the three year vomited everyone went CRAZY! My husband looked like he’d been shot when my son vomited on him in the bed. My daughter began screaming, “Ewwww…gross!” Even my 12 year old tried to hide in the bathroom as I was trying to clean up my baby. I instead was acting like a gladiator as I continuously cleaned sheets, gave out a dosage of Zofran and soothed my crying baby.
As I finally laid down to rest I realized that I do a lot of things that could make people (especially ones without kids) cringe. So, here’s my list of cringeworthy moments that made me realize I was a mother.
So you know you’re a mother when..
- you get a phone call from your 4 year old who is hysterical because she lost the necklace you bought her. So on the way to pick her up you go and buy another one…just to make her happy.
- you have thoughts of getting on the middle school bus after your twelve year old tells you that some 8th graders were bullying the younger kids.
- you ask a million and one questions to the preschool about why your child’s face is scratched. And all the workers keep saying to you is, “Calm down Ms. BossyGirl.”
- you’re not mortified that the toddlers get so angry with the flight attendants that they begin to throw peanuts at them every time they pass our seat.
- your daughter tries to tackle the Atlanta Hawks mascot at a Mommy Blogger event you attended.
- the 12 year old asks you to help him blow his nose…and he’s dead serious about it.
- you try and give some medicine to ANY of your kids that they kick and scream so much that the neighbor comes over to make sure everyone is alright.
- you’re operating on about two hours of sleep but you still manage to get up and fix breakfast..even though all you really want to do is SLEEP.
- you have to crawl from under a changing room door to chase your three year old who thinks it’s funny to break out in a run- for no apparent reasons.
- you wipe enough butts and noses you swear your children are still in diapers.
In the end, I really do a lot. But that’s what I signed up for when I decided to get married. Does anyone else feel me?